I Think I'm Paranoid...

...or at least some people are. As part of my job, I occasionally have to ask for telephone numbers and asking for telephone numbers is obviously like asking for your soul sometimes.

My favorite example of this was when I had to ask an old man for his number. He didn't write it down on the paper and I assumed he may have forgotten to write it. So I asked, and he got this look on his face like I just asked him if I could kill him. He started on this paranoid whispered rant which ended in him asking, "Do you really need my phone number?" My answer was yes. It's for records in case the pass got lost or they needed more information. Anyway, he eventually gave in, but he beckoned me to move closer and whispered his phone number in my ear. I assume that he is a past secret agent who broke some law and has been on the run for years, struggling to hide his identity. I hope I didn't condemn him to death by strange accident, but it would be the most interesting thing I have ever inadvertently caused if it happened. There was lady who curtly told me, "I don't give my phone number out" and proceeded to walk away. I was forced to do without it, and also to give her pass to her less paranoid friend.

So I'm wondering... what do people think that we're going to do with their phone numbers? Prank call them? Steal their identity? Tell the government that they're communists? I'm not sure, but obviously they're pretty paranoid about giving out numbers. Now in a previous job, I had to ask people if their salary was above or below a number. I can see the logic in being hesitant to distribute that information (though I think it's silly nonetheless.) A salary is a way to determine your place in society and is something you have the potential to be judged by. But... how does that even apply to phone numbers? Phone numbers that never leave our records? Okay, someone might hack into them, but most likely they aren't going after phone numbers, they're going after money or control of the system or something like that.

I just find it ridiculous how people can be so worried to give out information- expect for the secret agent guy. His story (that I made up for him) makes total sense. I feel bad that he's lying in a gutter somewhere now and dead and killed by the government.

rantrantrantrantrant

Okay... I'm not really going to use this blog to rant all of the time... but I need to now.

When did people stop thinking that leaving their brights on the whole entire drive was appropriate?

Tonight I got blinded several times, even after the customary blinking-of-one's-own-lights-to-alert-other-drivers-that-they-had-their-lights-on thing, which I did. Sadly most people thought it was a blink-your-brights game, which it wasn't. Needless to day they got harsh words and a bird, even though they couldn't hear or see it. It made me feel better.

I mean, really, how do you not notice that your brights are on? Or do people not care? If they don't, they are officially the worlds biggest jerks.

Just like a lot of customers today. (this is another part of the rant, btw) I think today is probably one of the most angry days I've had in awhile- receiving and distributing. Maybe it was the heat, but I got so many angry faces and comments from customers today. I was able to stay in cheerleading mode and not get angry back, but still- I don't know what they had to rage about. The lines were sooo much shorter today than yesterday. I guess today was just a bad day. But anyway... tomorrow is a cook-out day and more specifically- not working! Which is good. I need a break.

OMG

I know, it's a lame title for a blog post, but that's the current state of my mind. I just got home after working from 10:30 to 10:30. Thats not zero hours, that twelve. Why would I agree to work twelve hours? That's a good question, and it has a cheesy answer: because they needed me. They really did.

Today was opening day at the amusement park and it was crazy. This year we have season passes, and they seem to be all the rage. So much that from 9:30 am to 10:30 pm, there was a massive line in the building where season passes are sold. I'm pretty sure I have never done that much work at the amusement park, and definitely not this year. I think this was karma's way of making up for my completely boring work week.

So, I worked twelve hours. What did I gain? A new day to compare what others consider to be very busy days, a shiny plastic coin that states "You've been caught being good!" that enables me to claim a gift card or some other prize from the human resources, and a general feeling that I accomplished something at work today. Because honestly, if I'm doing nothing at work, it feels like I'm not even working.

When it comes down to it, I would rather be way to busy and stressed than not busy at all.

Dystopias and the Like

So I just finished Brave New World today... and have determined that I wouldn't mind living in that society. Okay, so everybody has been drugged into happiness and there are no relationships anymore... but is that necessarily a bad thing? Maybe its just my current mindset but taking a soma vacation whenever I need it doesn't seem like a bad thing at all. There is constant entertainment and family around if you need a friend. You're encouraged to have fun and you know your place and role in life. Plus there's prolonged youth, which is highly attractive.

But why is this a dystopia? I mean, what I've described so far is pretty nice, right? Okay... here's the thing. Any book or music or film or anything not happy is censored. Shakespeare? Who's he? They wiped out the works of several authors and also religion, which would be a problem for a lot of people. They've eliminated marriage and replaced it with casual sex with several different people. They keep the high level science out of the labs and on islands which are kind of like prisons. Thinking isn't a major thing at all...

And right, now, that sounds pretty nice. Soma, no thinking, friendship, entertainment... Yeah. I could go for that. I think after awhile I would get bored though. But maybe I wouldn't. Who knows. Anyway, now to Pillars of Creation... Book seven of terry goodkind's sword of truth series. I'm excited

Carp... OF DOOM!!!

Before you ask... yes, I am talking about carp, the fish. And when I say of doom, I mean, OF DOOM!!! You might be imagining just one fish. This guy, for instance.

What's so threatening about that guy? He even has a lol on his picture. Lolfish. Lolfish are harmless, right? Don't underestimate him (her? I dunno fish genders.)

If any bit of food, or trash, or anything is thrown near this guy... the picture changes to this...

Enter hungry hungry fish mob. They eat popcorn, fish food, left over hamburgers, whatever you have. Keep your small children away from the railing, because you'll soon be saying "Carps ate my baby." Not as terrifying as dingoes, but still as effective.

Today a group had half a trash bag of popcorn. The fish consumed it in three minutes. There are lots and lots of carp. They're like tribbles. Their only purpose is to eat and reproduce, and occasionally provide an interesting view. But its not even like that. Tribbles are cute and cuddly. These guys are like replicators, and they're terrifying. Guests to the park don't think twice about tossing food into the lake. Why should they? The fish all clamor to the surface and pile on each other and if you've never seen anything like it before, its amusing.

But you know what? Evolution began with small cells in water that after a few evolutions became fish, and then they grew legs. What happens when these guys grow legs, huh? We will be facing a carp army. It'll be like that one recent Doctor Who episode with the vampire/fish people that were trying to take over the world. These carp will bring the end!!!

/paranoid theories.

But seriously... I'm pretty sure they would eat a small child.

Rage Time: Uganda Edition

I love Current tv. It's entertaining and partially run by the viewer. It can be funny, serious, and comment on society. One show that takes the last two traits and throws them together is Vangaurd, which does in depth documentaries about certain things. They do a really good job and try and keep a fair bias. However, there are certain issues that they can't do that with. Example? Uganda and the proposed anti-gay bill.

This makes me soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo angry. I know that's a long 'so' but I have lots of rage. Very rarely do things get me all angry and such. Generally I can keep a distance on things in the political and social world, but this, this is craziness.

In case you didn't hear about this story at all, I'll recap it. Uganda wants to put in place a bill that makes it illegal to be homosexual. That's right... illegal. Not only do they want to make it illegal, they want to be make it a death worthy crime. Now there is some debate about how serious they're going to make it, but whatever. It comes down to this.

Uganda is a primarily Christian nation so it's not weird that American pastors would come and speak to the people. (Well, it might be. How many Ugandan pastors do you see in America?) But that's not the point. The point is that some Evangelicals decided to deliver a sermon on the "Gay Agenda." They claimed that the homosexuals were trying to corrupt the children and make them gay by bribing them with electronics and money and other such things.

A couple things wrong with this...

#1. Maybe I'm being stereotypical here, but how many Ugandans have money to buy these high tech electronics (laptops and iPods) in large enough batches to 'convert' enough children to make it an issue? Ok, so they claim Ugandans aren't doing it, but the Swiss and American (not cheeses, btw) are the evil people behind this. Could it be that the homosexual couples from Switzerland and America merely want to help the world and don't have families to raise in their countries? Maybe they want to help the local students by providing them with technology... no, wait, that's silly. They must be trying to convert the children.

#2. What would be the purpose of converting children to homosexuality? Some big gay army? Some homosexual take over of the world? I'm thinking that that is what's running through Parliaments minds, but what if they just want to help children (teenagers, really) who are homosexual. What if they want them to be able to have a safe place to be? Well, if you're homosexual and in Uganda, there is no safe place.

Attacks have been made on homosexuals in Uganda for years. It's the way of the world. It even happens in America (Day of Silence). However, since the Evangelicals spoke they've been getting worse. Homosexuals are now being imprisoned for crimes such as sodomy and general gayness (not the official term, but it works.) In the bill, they want to make loving a person of the same gender a crime punishable by death. Death.

This just makes me very angry... almost as angry as I was at the UN for the Rwanda thing during freshman year of high school. But anyway... it's late, and I need to rest.

But seriously, inform people that this is going on because as Americans, we don't always get world news, and this is important. If Uganda passes it, what are the odds that it could spread to more parts of Africa, and then to other countries? That's a worst case scenario, but you get my meaning, right? Injustice like this must be stopped because if we don't stop it, we're letting fellow homo sapiens suffer for being themselves and that isn't right.

Middle Schoolers

In a world before Memorial Day, amusement parks are but dreams of families and students that are stuck in jobs or school. However, for a few lucky students, their schools feel that taking their pupils to an amusement park for a day is a good idea. These students are generally in middle school- which means they are at an age where they feel that the unchaperoned time away from parents and adults makes them special, awesome, and pretty much invincible. This can be seen in the way they treat employees and each other.
As an employee, I notice these things. Rarely is 'please' or 'thank you' heard and if you're a slightly attractive female, groups of young boys love to ogle. Luckily they aren't brave enough to talk you... unless they are. Then you get to experience bad pick-up lines and humorous attempts to impress college-aged girls. These attempts are worst if you work near the arcade or other boardwalk game. This enables them to try and be successful at things such as DDR and that one game where you hit the button with a hammer and try to make the lights go to the top. Needless to say, it never works. You have to smile and move on.
Not all boys are like this though. There are few nerdy ones, but they seem shy and more interested in spending time with friends. They often remember 'please's and 'thank you's and aren't outwardly interesting in trying to impress you. However, these are few, and fist pumps/party boying happens a lot more often.
I heard an old man say today "Any more of those crazy oversexed children today?" I was trying to think of what he meant, and then it hit me. Most of the girls I watched pass by were in shorts so short they barely counted as actual clothing. The tanktops weren't a lot better. Now I'm not saying that this is all below me. At the moment, I'm typing this in an outfit similar to what I saw there. I guess it's just a reflection of our society changing, but I recall my mother telling me several times that I needed to change before I left the house because she wasn't a fan of styles that made girls look like "hussies."
It's a bit weird watching middle schoolers because I easily remember when I was that age. I was dark, morbid, depressing, and had a complete hatred for anything main stream- however, I recall wanting all the popular clothes and secretly listening to pop music as if it were a horrible sinful thing to do. (It probably is.) These students seem entirely different. It's only been 5 years since I was there, but the world of middle school has changed.
There are things that remain the same though. Boys and girls still live in different groups, and rarely interact unless there is a relationship. Occasionally there will be mixed groups without a relationship, but I often question the males in these groups. They seem very excited and wear flamboyant colors. I know it's wrong of me, but past experience has taught me that those cases are 83% correct.
Economically they make horrible decisions. I was working near the arcade I think that some of them poured at least thirty dollars into gaming. These games didn't even give tickets for prizes. They were simple games- with no reward, and the students poured money into them. This is good for business, but I don't understand their logic. Hopefully they get over that someday.

So after all of this, I don't know what I've learned? Was the old man right in calling them "crazy" and "oversexed"? No, but at the same time, they aren't the exact opposite either. They're at a growing stage- physically and mentally. Let's just hope that fist pumps and general disregard for other human beings gets knocked out of the DNA for their next phase- high school.

Stories About People I Don't Even Know: Episode One

(Occasionally I get bored and make up stories about people at my work. This is one.)

Once upon a time there was a man who always felt different. In his youth, friends would make general fools of themselves in the pursuit of the opposite gender. He thought it was a bit silly to reduce himself to that level, but he played along anyway because that's what boys were expected to do- chase after girls. And he always felt that if his friends were happy, he would be happy. He was that kind of person.
When his friends reached their early thirties, they began to settle down and start their professional lives. The man felt like it wasn't for him, but he followed along anyway. He met a woman who was beautiful, physically and mentally. However, he still wasn't as happy as he could be. After 15 years of marriage, his wife was injured in a horrible car accident that left her in a coma- a very deep coma. The doctors said she most likely wouldn't recover. He felt like he should hold on for a little more, despite the doctor's opinions that he should let her go.
It was two years later and he was by the hospital bed, talking to his non-responsive wife when there was a knock at the door.
"Excuse me, I just have to check her vitals." the nurse said, entering the room.
"Ah. Ok. I better be going now anyway. Places to be, things to do." The man got out of the chair and proceeded to leave, but the nurse stopped him before he reached the door.
"I just thought I should let you know... The doctors are talking about pulling the plug soon. They have no hope for recovery. Just wanted to warn you." The nurse had an apologetic look that said more than words.
"Oh," the man held back tears as he took in this information,"okay. I'll talk with them about it I guess." He started to exit again when the nurse spoke abruptly.
"I don't know you, but you seem lonely. I'm sure this is hard on you. My name is Cole, and I would like to eat lunch with you."
The man looked up, and for the first time in a long time, he felt that his heart was where its supposed to be.
That lunch was the beginning of a friendship, which turned into a relationship. The evolution occurred the month that they pulled the plug on his wife.
3 years after the plug got pulled, the couple went to an amusement park, where the man would propose to Cole later that evening on the ship that toured the lake.


Ok... reality time. There were just these two guys (one younger, one older) walking around. I thought it would be interesting if they were a couple... hence the story.

An Introduction

This summer I have decided that I am going to do something useful with my time at work, besides working. You may ask, what else is there to do at work besides work? That, my friends, is what this blog is going to be. I work at a small amusement park that gets people from all over the state visiting it, and the people are all very interesting. In my Introduction to Anthropology class, we did several observations, and I got to thinking today... why not use my job as one big observation for a potential ethnographic study in the future? Now chances are I'm not ever going to write that ethnography. I have better things to do with my time. And this blog isn't going to be purely ethnographic either. I will share what I'm doing and interesting ideas and thoughts that come to me in the hours I spend working here too. So... yeah. That's the goal. I'm also horrible about keeping these things up to date.